amniotic fluid dress

Wearing an image is very much an “im going in” affair. I lose myself to the image, i become it. Its fabric clings to my skin then seeps in. The ‘be careful you don't drown’. But how else does one learn to swim if they dont go into the water? Amniotic fluids scare boys and so we live in a culture that prides itself in not getting lost in an image. Scorned as vanity and narcissism yet in this scorning retroactively creating a palatable self-portrait. The social seamstress makes sure everyone wears the same uniform dress, sewing them into place with all the segregation of a fashion. But the self is a signature, not a fashion. The self signs itself onto the fashion and a subject radically incapable of knowing itself feigns mastery over an inevitable fall. An “it was all planned” neurosis of fate. Identifying with the moment of mind over matter and not with the moment that is matter over mind does not stop the self from signing. Your signature continues writing itself even when you are not looking, it signs itself through sleep and dreams you through and through. This unharmonious harmony, this asymmetry, is what permits me the pleasure of being embarrassed, surprised, petrified, enchanted…